I’m Working On It!

Oh My! This process of launching my site been longer than I thought to get this project started. 

I decided to remove my coming soon page lest it never come soon or ever for that matter.

My schedule is all over the place and backwards lately. I do have multiple responsibilities as a mom. I homeschool my child. I am also an autoimmune patient as you may have guessed. And due to that autoimmune am visually impaired also. My vision issues definitely makes short task take days in some cases. Something I didn’t account for when starting. 

I will say I did have much energy when I started this project.  If you are also an autoimmune sufferer know very well that like the moon waxes and wanes. Over days not a month. We never know what a day or week brings on the exhaustion levels. And the more I worked on multi projects the more tired I got…. 

Even when I made the plans to be there one on one for people who are getting through their own difficulties, I took into account the time I can safely give without over extending myself and becoming useless to others. I also planned for times I may be in hospital and planned ways I can still be there for appointments when I am, and continue with one-on-ones even if. That is if people don’t mind me looking bad while continuing of course.

Though I am denied care in most cases it’s not really a worry per say. I still took it into account. Especially if I get back home where I have real care and treatment not butchers who collect pay while harming and participating in creative charting as I call it. 

I am getting together a space in my home where I can dedicate time for my time I need to focus on my site. I like to be organized and I can’t have every project at the able or on my bed. I’m used to having my own office so the set up I have is driving me bonkers. That is this weeks assignment for me where I can focus on this easier.

Eventually getting the content to you that I intended. 

I’m not sure about you, but I need everything neat and tidy to focus and also to be organized. It’s easier for me to concentrate.  Which I must say,  before my autoimmune was not my strongest skill. But it was necessary for me.  And definitely since autoimmune it is my weakest aspect of life. Many things went into my “get to it later” bin. I had to prioritize organized bills or feed child many days. So you know the “feed child” left those bills in disarray. And for the longest time I had piles of laundry that I never folded just too sore, weak and exhausted. While wasting precious energy in doctors offices being ignored wasting precious energy.

Another reason I did not and do not have all the bells and whistles and “luxuries of life” to do this project easy, is and  was my lack of interest in investing in a nation I do not live in nor building a livable home environment. It was a waste of money for me. I have what I need and that is it. I’m not interested in living my life here and never have been. Ummm, I will write a post about this in the future. I know it sounds bizarre… Nonetheless I don’t have writing space or office space here.

Anyway, I also have been working on a legal case. I am getting all my exhibits ready and going through tons of medical documents and receipts, fraudulent notes of fraudsters who intended to harm me, time proof of whereabouts and proof of what has happened to me has seriously taken longer than I expected. Especially with the vision issues I have. Plus homeschooling, and regular chores. 

Not to mention I had to figure out the fraud and which parts were fraudulent. And not being in insurance or or legal or medical it was very difficult. But of course those who were harming me and preventing prison sentences were definitely of no help. They when when I in beginning, asked for protocol in certain aspects denied me. For obvious reasons now but before I thought is was to prevent lawsuits for misdiagnosis. 

Much much worse it was…

This is why I decided to just yank off the coming soon page and leave open for people who keep popping in to view and see if I am up and running yet. I felt I’d never get it off the ground unless I did. I would have kept thinking about the posts I wanted to write and never do them while trying to get the legal part finished. 

Well to a point I can stop thinking of it obsessively and no longer imagine what the weasels are going to say when all comes out. Though the evidence speaks for itself they really can’t say anything. And if they do well, it wont work out so well because I have that figured out for the most part too. Their colleagues have already tried to back them up o they ave been added to my enemy number one list. 

It’s a really long story…

Once I have everything completed and all my final details for legal I will be able to focus on this site more and getting all the info to my readers that I wanted to share. 

But going through medical documents was definitely draining emotionally and physically. Emotionally exceptionally so because I had been harmed so intentionally and intently it brought a lot of anger rage and sorrow going through the documents. 

It is definitely taking longer than I thought. 

I did start a project before. I was hell bent on destroying the people who did this to me and my child. To be honest I still am hell bent on decimating them. But I had so much anger and I was letting that be known in my writing but felt pointless. Though I did feel relief after each post it was exhausting. I guess not using the anger the right way. 

It isn’t really my character to hold grudges as I am usually happy and move on while people who harm are left in their useless lives. But I couldn’t move forward because doctors disabled me and left me for dead. There was no answers, no closure, no medical help, no correct diagnosis to deflect and prevent me catching them. Just harm. So anger is going to be an issue.

Now I feel justice is coming the closer I am to finishing this package of documents and everything else.

But I did say and decided I’m not going to only decimate these people. I’m going to empower other people and show them ways to avoid harm and prevent it happening to them. I will share what I have learned about “dirty people” and those who “creative chart” their patients for financial gain and self preservation only. 

And share ways for others to keep faith in getting better and things and types they may come up against in their own journey. And of course she tips on how to maintain sanity and self respect while demanding that self respect be respected, instead of trampled like happens to many seeking answers for their health issues.

But rage only was not an avenue I could reasonably take. It was taking a toll and had a snowball effect. It was turning into a giant abominable snowman while getting larger. Not good for my soul soul nor health. And especially not good for autoimmune. Although I think it had its benefits. 

I guess I still have my anger. I think I am dealing with it differently. 

I hope you stick around have patience! And I definitely hope what I share in future posts helps. Forgive me if it is a little sparse around here. It won’t be for long.